My favourite you ask? heehee, the one who practically does an entire solo at 2:48. I am a freaking sucker for men who can dance like that. He's the one wearing sunglasses in one of the dance scenes. His name is EUNHYUK. without a doubt, the best dancer in the entire group.

what a hectic week, we've all been experiencing. well, not really. it's been kind of mellow for some, but it has definitely been a roller coaster for me. Oh namira, when will you ever stop saying that your life is a rollercoaster? practically everyone's life goes up and down. what with the whole air ada pasang dan surut shit. sigh. I am so cliche.

managed to get alot of things done by this week and I have been so proud of the results. I am POSITIVE that there is a peribahasa about getting what you deserve but damn I can't recall it.
I got a nine/25 for my physics test. It's a fail but I was so happy because it was better than expected considering my major in physics. Furthermore I got a 16/30 for my economics test. I am very proud of that. sungguh. awaiting chemistry, math and malay now. I cannot believe mr.wong wants me to drop chem H2. then might as well NOT be in the science stream right? bugger.

also, me and the pubics got the house score board done. we've decided to forget the whole 'vision' idea completely. the house committee for 2009 doesn't have a vision. WE ARE THE VISION DAMN IT. cheyyy. baik kappa. haha someone quote me.

OH RIGHT. I sprained my foot on friday. I didn't sprain my ankle, like normal non-airheaded people do, but I sprained my foot. but I am wearing ern's ankle guard. I was spinning, spinning and spinning during dance and I just fell. the last thing I heard was ern telling me not to lean back. then I fell.

now I limp wherever I go but on the plus side, I GET TO WEAR AN ANGLE GUARD. I mean, clearly, only sporty, cool and athletic people wear ankle guards. so now when people ask, 'OMG NAMIRA WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR FOOT?' I get to say, 'oh I sprained it when I was dancing.' I am not going to say 'oh, I fell on my foot,' because that makes me sound like such a bimbo. how do I know this is because when faris asked me 'what happened to your foot?' I said 'oh I fell on it.' then he was like 'how can you fall when you dance?' when I thought about it I was like yeah, the dude has a point.

mjc has some of the most profound people. though, thoroughly blatant.
I need deep breaths. in with the good air and out with the weird air.

well. I think this week I've professed the phrase 'I love you' more than I reckoned I ever could. the situation just calls for it, you know? I didn't think that one person needed reassurance but heck, I had to give it to him. sometimes, he is just so annoying but sometimes he is just wow. yep. WOW. (:

these were a strokes of bloody genious! thank god technology is good for something!
the second video's robots danced better I think. still, the first is so cute and robot-ish.
SO CUTE PLEASE WATCH IT.

yesterday I fasted. As in abstinence fasted, not speed fasted. Wait there is no such word. Well assuming the abruptness of my first statement, I guess I should explain.

I woke up alone yesterday at around five to stuff my face with food so that I'd be able to withstand the whole day. I ate half a packet of mee kway teow goreng and a bowl of cookie crisp cornflakes. I drank three cups of water, and went to go study maths (which almost made me curse but I was not allowed to because I was fasting.)

When I arrived at school, little did I realise how difficult it was to keep my tongue in check. I said jackass in the first hour and several followed after. Syafiqah said I performed a m-u-phlegm-rim. So adding all of those up together, it's apparent that I committed so many sins that I might as well have not fasted. Well I have to because last year I was having you-know-what.

Damn it. Some more cikgu rai gave us HELLO PANDA DURING MOTHER TONGUE. AND DURING ECONS TUTORIAL MS.TAN WAS GOING THROUGH A QUESTION ABOUT PIZZAS. hahahahahha it makes me laugh to think about it now. you know what, I had a major bimbo moment, which does not occur often. I was going to the toilet, then when I came back, I walked past my classroom because I thought my one was at the end. I didn't realise until I saw some chinese dude sitting at my seat at the class beside and when I heard roars of laughter exploding from my real classroom.

sigh.
eh I am going to eat now.
bye.

BAIK KAPPA MEMBERS.

today was an exceptionally sweet day. I loved today. it was particularly happy, sunny and everything seemed to be going well. I had good vibes about today. OH. but there were some bitter moments as well. can't I ever go through a day without it being tainted by negativity? I wonder.

SWEET:
on wednesdays, me and syafiqah do not go to school together. okay this is not the sweet part in case you were wondering. I don't know why we don't but I guess it's just something we've gotten used to since the dawn of the days we started walking to school together which was like secondary three or something. Wednesdays were always late. which meant namira could sleep longer, and syafiqah wouldn't have to wait. it's a pretty efficient system if you ask me.

soooo, this morning was a mad mad rush. I had to finish my chem tutorial, malay kefahaman and the GP presentation which was BLOODY IRONIC because I will tell you why later. so I didn't managed to finish anything which was perfectly fine by me because at least I managed to cover a bit of everything. hmm, this is beginning to sound more and more bitter than sweet. oh well. so I was late, it was seven forty and I still wasn't dressed and my clothes were not pressed (OMG THAT RHYMES). So I was rushing like mother freaker and I was only ready at eight.

at this point I had already imagined the look on Ms Lai's face as I strode into the hall, blantantly late, with a panic-stricken look on my face. I pictured the whole thing perfectly; from the slide she would most probably show about ATTITUDE or some crap like that, right down to the annoying snickers of my classmates. It was beginning to dawn on me that my day would not start uncrappily. Thus, my busride was jittery. I cursed every red traffic light and silently prayed for the bus driver to suddenly have to urgently take a piss and drive alot faster.

HOWEVER, when I arrived there at EIGHT TWENTY, which was 'five minutes late', most of my classmates were still at the atrium. S111 and S113 were still at the study benches and there were alot of people gathered outside the hall. I was saved! thank God for principals who just cannot shut up. the bloody thing started at EIGHT FORTY FIVE which was unbelievable. faces of impatience and annoyance were common sights outside the hall.

BITTER:
the talk was... entertaining. well, actually to be honest, I wasn't quite paying attention to what she was saying. But I got a gist of it. Especially the parts where she slammed the arts students. That part was uncalled for because as far as I am concerned, the arts people I know did relatively well. I didn't really feel she should have displayed such a negative air about the Arts students. The science students' results weren't remarkable anyway.

basically to sum it all up, she had only three suggestions to give us. in the whole forty five minutes for which she spoke she only told us to do three things:

"1. don't fail backwards. fail forward never mind. fail backwards cannot.
2. drop a freaking H2 subject.
3. when all else fails, get out of MJC already. clearly your standards are too mediocre for my uber cool custom animations that I used in my uber cool powerpoint presentation. "

I discussed it with my father this evening. My father came up with a brilliant conclusion for the WHOLE SITUATION, which is not surprising. he said that Ms. Lai was actually using REVERSE PSYCHOLOGY on us. quote unquote from dad 'namira, now you're angry. but trust me, every student in that hall will go back to their parents, complain and then go study like kiasu to prove your principal wrong. your principal wants you to prove to her that she is wrong. don't you see?'

MY DAD'S A GENIUS. WHOA OH OH OH OH OH OH.

just to round up my entire day, funfestique was abnormally FANTASTIK. PHOBOS IS JUST AMAZING. THANK YOU TO EVERY SINGLE PERSON IN PHOBOS FOR MAKING THIS WHOLE EVENT A BLOODY SUCCESS. to EMILYN! YOU WERE FANTASTIC LA SAYANG. (:

secondly, banner day was today. the day when we made A WHOLE NEW BANNER after making one already a few weeks ago. TO THE PERSON WHO STOLE OR THREW AWAY OUR BANNER, YOU HAVE CAUSED A MAJOR INCONVENIENCE FOR ALL OF US PUBLICITY I/Cs. Not forgetting Suuuhaidah and Syafiqah and Debra(h) and all the other house committee members who helped and supported us. I don't know who the hell you think you are, but if you do anything to put my friends and I in a rut again, I am going to burn down the school.

but I should thank you, because this banner looks quite nice.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN DO IT AGAIN. our banner is kept safe and tight in the house committee room where no one can touch it except well.. house comm members! and teachers. and cleaners who have keys to every room in the school.


goodnight everyone, I shall turn in now.


you're scary when you come near me and breathe on me.
that's why you're never scary.
because you never do.

radyzxz; how can I not listen to jet? they're the sex.

allyy; alllyyyyyyyyyyyyyy.

mary; which girl?

Errfee; I had to send a message across. I guess my love for coke was enhanced that way. haha how could you expect any different fee?

Xiao Qi; HAHAHA OOPS I HOPE SHE DOESN'T SEE MY TYPO. yes it was a brilliant idea indeed:D Well I'm glad others can relate to it. makes me feel less alone. (omg just imagine how long I've not been replying my messages. this was even before the funfestique board was constructed!)

Connie; OMG REMIND ME TO BE JEALOUS OF YOUR HALO THE NEXT TIME I SEE IT. which is nevaaaahhhh because it is invisible muahahaha.

Sabrina; you've always understood me and everything I said sweetheart. (:

khairiah; that is one of the nicest things anyone has ever said to me. thanks so much khairiah! haha though at times my stories can get too primary-six-composition-ey. but thanks sayang. I truly appreciate it. (:

ffariz; yeah I know surprising right? oh well. thank GOD for fiction.

mary; yeah well, not exactly how we planned it to turn out, wasn't it?

SALLY; OMG CHOCOLATE BOX THANK YOU SWEETIE!

Fadhil; don't worry got next year can try again fadhil. haha thanks so much! even though you wished me in school. hahaha (:

Tricia; aww thanks so much dearest! haha you never do? that's good to know ;) I know. and I'll always be here for you.

Zarifah; hahahaha thanks ZARIFAH SWEETIE(: you remembered?

Sabrina; thank you my darling :D

shareefah; HELLO HELLO! thank you so much!

ky; KUAN YONG MY DARLING THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR REMEMBERING.

Tricia; same here dearest(:

Connie; HELLO CONNIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.

vee!; LOVES YOU ALOT TOO ANGEL.

syafiqah; SYAF! it is orbit laa. where got off-beat! HAHAHAHAHA.

Connie; OMG CONNIEKINS WILL YOU ALWAYS HYPERVENTILATE WHEN YOU PASS BY MY CLASS? for me never mind ah. hahahaha.

Nadia: hahaha nadia ni tau. you kan sayang I. jangan nak jealous ah. hahahhaah.

sharifah nabilah; OMG NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. NO NO NO NO NO. if skinny tall chindian take me out on a date I don't know what I'd do.

how does one define herself as a dancer? tell me, so I can start acting like one.

upsetting today. not upset, but upsetting.

I realize that I have failed to update my blog as frequently as before and this dictates by ever so perceived decline to virtual abandonment. Oh well. Right now my brother is playing with his stupid paper airplane and it keeps hitting my head and he keeps looking sheepish when I scold him and saying 'heh heh, sorry kakak. I'm not driving the plane.'

you know my brother used the word 'restless' in the appropriate context today? Unbelievable!

Not going to talk about trip to malaysia yesterday and trip back to singapore today because it's just nauseating. I forgot to bring my earphones to malaysia so I was suffering from an overwhelming case of motion sickness all the way across the causeway. And I wasn't at all comforted by the malay songs that my father insisted on playing on the radio, that night.

I met my house committee people today at City Hall. God I love City Hall. Hopefully the next time I go on a date, a charming skinny boy will bring me there. I mean what can you not love about it? There's superb shopping oppurtunities, great food and the ESPLANADE! I go gaga for the esplanade.

My house committee were disbelieving to the fact that I travelled all the way back from M'sia just to come and meet them. Fadhil said that I 'should have just stayed in Malaysia'. I couldn't miss our first ever house committee outing! It was integral that I was present.

LJS was consumed by our laughter and Matthew's instructions about the games that were coming up this week. *suddenly remembers that I bought kuih just now and have yet to still eat it and goes to kitchen to get it*
We're really excited for the upcoming ending of Funfestique! But it'd be a shame to see it all end, considering all the fun we had making it happen.

there's a physics test tomorrow which I am positive I am going to pass.
Well, I'm sure I'm going to pass.
hopefully.
praying for a pass.
I should just give up now.

on the way to Malaysia, with my mind unentertained by the soft flow or the loud blasts of music, what else was there to think about?


hmmm..... well maybe the trip wasn't so bad.(:

I am indeed very exhausted after everything that's been going on. It's very draining and I don't like feeling tired. I just have a phobia of being exploited or feeling vulnerable. which isn't helpful considering I've been pushed and shoved for the past two weeks. Nonetheless, I aim to stand my ground and not to be rash anymore; though it is natural for me to do so. Chrystal lessons teach us to be resillient. But they don't teach us how to handle our emotions better.

On my way to school today I called Siska up because I was wondering whether she could hang out with me after school since its practically a day off. She was in the MRT already while I was just in the bus. Imagine the hours that polythecnic students have to be up and travelling. She said she was already at bedok. haha. we talked for a while, but we kept breaking up because she kept entering tunnels.

I miss you Siska. like nobody else.

Funfestique has been an undeniable rollercoaster but it has been bloody worth it. The people I've met and the new friends I've made from all five houses has just been an amazing experience for me. And the whole feeling of having to be responsible, the wind in your hair as you rush from venue to venue to assist the games that are going on or to cheer your house members on is just exhilirating. And who better to share it with than my baik kappa phobos members, hmm?

there are many hidden contreversies now. Zipping about and flying around, no one knows who or what. but one thing's for sure, everyone knows why. being a house committee member, you feel an unavoidable sense of... what's the word for it.... competition? yes competition. you feel so protective of your house pride that at times, it gets in the way of some things. like friendship. I don't know if any of you reading this would know what I mean, but it's definitely there. poised and threating. waiting for the misjudgement or the misunderstanding. when someone would falter and say 'what did you just say to me?'. then it would definitely strike. hurting the weak. the vulnerable.

funfestique huh? who comes up with these names? I mean they're awesome but they are so... orbit?


I know you read this.
serves you right.

I only go to your blog, just to see how much worse this is all going to get. then when I arrive and read whatever you say, I just cross my arms and say 'damn, just when I thought she couldn't get any bitchier.'

stop bitching since that is what YOU HATE RIGHT? so stop and try to look at yourself, please? do you like what you see? of course you do, since you never look inside of yourself.

everyday I stop to think how the hell this is going to get any worse and as days pass they just do.
no one needs your opinion. so for once, shut up.

you know things go bad when two people you really care about starts arguing.
I mean SERIOUSLY.

I didn't mean to blow this all out of proportion I really didn't. I didn't mean to fuel an argument between people who used to be so close. I don't even know why I am posting this! Honestly it's going to make things much worse than they already are. But I have to say something and not just leave it all out there for people to see. And this is between the three of us, honestly I didn't know how people who are not involved in this managed to get tangled up in the situation I really don't. Exactly how many people know about this? THIS isn't even a problem it's just something that cocked up in the process.

To HER:
WHAT DID YOU EXPECT ME TO THINK? You may think I jumped to a conclusion and maybe I did. Okay I KNOW I did. But honestly, what else could I think? Out of NOWHERE this absolutely random and awful post on your journal popped out and when I asked you, you blamed it on a guy whom we've only talked about A YEAR AGO? AND FOR THE SHORTEST AMOUNT OF TIME POSSIBLE? And a post that so magically coincides with our problem here now? YOU don't tell me anything anymore what am I supposed to think? GO AHEAD AND CALL ME PERASAAN IF YOU WANT but fucking really, I couldn't make sense of the whole situation. You didn't want to tell me anything, even though I did. Even if I really didn't want to. Because I knew this would happen.

You say you feel indifferent about him. If you did then would you COMPLETELY ERASE HIM FROM YOUR CONTACTS? that isn't indifference, that is genuinely wanting to avoid someone. TELL ME WHAT'S WRONG. for once don't lie to me. don't make up stories like you've been known to do. For god's sake, you cannot blame me for thinking that you absolutely hated me. you don't talk to me, you don't share. it wasn't like how it used to be. and if you say you don't want to continue our relationship like how it used to be, I understand.

sharing is different than bitching.
you should know that.
I was hurt because you refused to tell me what I wanted to know most.
and he was the only one there who could understand me.

you say I've done something that you never reckoned me to do. but why don't you re-read your post and tell me that again.
tell me upfront please. don't hide behind livejournal posts.
if you want to argue, say it to my face. to publicise it for everyone to see. you might be thinking 'bitch you're doing the same.' this is because I have no intention of solving this problem through discussing with you. you might not hear from me for a long time. I hope you understand. me you and him need time to wrap this around of heads. think about what we've done.

just so you know, I was hurt by what you said. do you have reason to be? knowing I did not bitch? and what about YOU? WHO ELSE KNOWS ABOUT OUR PROBLEM? and how would I know that you didn't 'share' yourself?

but you were right about one thing though,
people should NEVER jump to conclusions.
and. they. should. never. lie.
To HIM:
I really didn't expect you to get so wound up over this. Couldn't we have talked this over? I know this involves you but weren't you the one who said that best friends shouldn't argue? especially over a boy? you told me that. and now you've started this whole problem that I now have to solve with her. Granted, this was a problem even before you intervented but now she is genuinely mad at me. you of all people should know that me and her have had our major differences that we couldn't solve.

maybe we did assume. maybe we did jump to a conclusion.
and maybe, me and her won't be best friends anymore. but if anything goes, it will go.
it's okay, I've accepted it.



I've nothing left to say. if this is how you want to end it, then so be it.

My life is not a fascination worth the scrutiny of those who watch over me. Yet, I live amongst thin air and sparkling personalities. I am an avid fan of the KoreanPop scene. So bring me to the number thirteen.

♥♥

HULABAGI

♥

Siska(HU)

♥

Mary(LA)

♥

Syaf(BA)

♥

OMG09S104!

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